Why Are Some Christian Parents Unchristian Towards Their Own Kids?

Ephesians 6:1-4 KJV
[1] Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right.
[2] Honour thy father and mother; (which is the first commandment with promise;)
[3] That it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth.
[4] And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.

Colossians 3:21 KJV
[21] Fathers, provoke not your children to anger , lest they be discouraged.

Some Christian parents think when it come to their children, Ephesians 6:1 is all that matters. They don’t continue reading to the next verses which talk about their responsibility to their kids. They think the child just has to be an extension of them, following rules blindly up to the time they become adults.

Such parents find it difficult to empathize with their children. Granted, a rebellious child should not be necessarily tolerated, but the manner in which parents respond to certain behaviors in their fallible kids can either break them (the kids) or make them.

Life is hard, and even adults cannot claim to have figured it out yet. Let alone their children. Some parents hold their children to high standards of the Bible, which they themselves do not uphold. Some parents are totally unoriginal when it comes to their kids.

For example, the mother who keeps quoting Bible verses to her teenage child, but will never ask the child how was her day at school, or how is her social life, what the child’s fears and dreams are in life, but keep shoving the Bible in her face in the name of
Proverbs 22:6 KJV
[6] Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.

How do you expect your child to grow up in the “way she should go”, if she is thinking there is an invisible God who is ‘always breathing down her neck’, but her visible mother doesn’t necessarily relate to her? How will she correlate the idea of a true, loving God who she can’t see, to a mother or father who doesn’t show the loving care every child needs in their life?

It’s a wonder how surprised such parents are when their kids grow up and stay away from churches in their adult life. Christianity is practical, I know that. I also know you can’t call yourself a good Christian and exclude the Bible from you and your family’s life.

But Christian parents, take Ephesians 6:4 and Colossians 3:21 seriously. Remember that the verses you rely on so heavily towards the upbringing of The Lord is on a condition. Let’s read it again.
Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right.

Children are obliged to obey their parents in The Lord. If you are always skulking/scowling towards the child while reading the Bible, where does that leave Joy? Cos the Bible commands us to rejoice? If you are always telling the child what she’s doing that is so bad, reminding her how imperfect she is, where does that leave Love? The Bible says :
1 Corinthians 13:6 ESV*
it [love] does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth.

These are just a few examples. In my own experience my parent kept shoving the Bible down my throat since I was eight years old, not taking her time, accusing me of what was in the Bible. Needless to say, it was hard on me because I grew up thinking I was the worst sinner alive. The Bible says we’ve all sinned and fallen short of the glory of God, but I grew up thinking nothing I ever did was nice to God because my parent didn’t even seem to think the Bible was powerful enough to change me, and kept going on and on about it. It’s a sad situation for anyone to grow up thinking God’s love is conditional based on what a supposedly Christian adult told them.

I will end this with a quote:

It is when we notice the dirt that God is most present in us; it is the very sign of His presence. C. S. Lewis

C.S. Lewis

He died not for men, but for each man. If each man had been the only man made, He would have done no less. C. S. Lewis

What HE Sees

Acts 1:6-8 ESV
So when they had come together, they asked him, “Lord, will you at this time restore the kingdom to Israel?” He said to them, “It is not for you to know times or seasons that the Father has fixed by his own authority. But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit has come upon you, and you will be my witnesses in Jerusalem and in all Judea and Samaria, and to the end of the earth.”

After all that they had seen Jesus do, and all that He had gone through with them, the question they asked after His resurrection showed clearly that they were still not exactly aware of what was going on. After the question they asked, Jesus completely gave them a different spiritual answer. He did not berate them or criticize them for not seeing things as they should have. Rather, He saw into the future when they would be witnesses of Him; to be a witness you have to be sure of one’s facts. He saw beyond their present lack to how it would be in the future. No matter the present, God knows what He sees in you. Even if that seems opposite to the future. God sees the best in you.

Freedom & Grace

2 Peter 3:18 ESV
But grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. To him be the glory both now and to the day of eternity. Amen.
Ephesians 2:8 ESV
For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God,
2 Corinthians 3:17 ESV
Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom.

As Christians sometimes we overlook certain privileges we have in Christendom. A Muslim sister ‘pleaded’ with a guy to get out of her shared room because she was naked. The reason she was naked was because she had not covered her hair! The Bible invites us to come as we are to Him. No conditions, except with an accepting heart. Let us grow in the grace that has located us to be called children of God.

BIBLE AND SCIENCE

Psalm 138:2 KJV
[2] for thou hast magnified thy word above all thy name.
Isaiah 40:22 ESV
It is he who sits above the circle of the earth,
Psalms 8:8 ESV
and the fish of the sea,
whatever passes along the paths of the seas.

Most people think that science disproves the Bible and the Bible is just some spiritual book that does not concern itself with other matters. The Word of God is a “double-edged sword”; it is not limited. Long when people believed the earth was flat, Isaiah had made it clear in the Bible that the earth was round. Matthew Maury, the father of Oceanography, had the idea when the verse Psalm 8:8 was read to him. A lot of people have tried to disprove Bible, but they have died, and The Bible remains the most popular book. The Word of God is indeed true and powerful.